Not mine!

I’m boarding my flight from DUS to MXP, the aircraft is a BAe 146, which in all honesty is better than other short haul narrowbodies, but which is renowned for its lack of luggage space.

The designers must have thought that squeezing the overhead bins to a minimum gave passengers the feeling of a cabin larger than what it really is.

So everytime I fly such an aircraft this scene repeats itself: the hostess throws herself out of the cabin to ask passengers to leave their luggage at the foot of the stairs so that it can be loaded in the cargo bay.

Some passengers like yours truly have been through a same procedure many times and know that, however amateurial, this procedure actually works pretty well and comply.

Some – as usual – do not understand and need to be sent down again when they try to board with their bag.

And then there’s the “not mine” guy. His bag is not smaller than any of the others, he has heard the hostess, eyes suspiciously the bags at the foot of the stairs, ignores them and tries to convince the flight attendant that his bag WILL fit. And of course it won’t, but he won’t capitulate before many fruitless attempts that slow down the whole line of boarding passengers, because – you guessed it – he’s of a rather stout complexion, and until he’s done with his manoeuvering there’s no way you will be able to squeeze through.

Usually he then falls down on a alternative solution which is to keep his bag under his legs because it won’t fit under the seat either, and another negotiation ensues; we all know he can’t win and wish this was over quickly so we can sit down and type this on our iPads (sorry if I rub it in a little…).

And then the pilot announces we lost our departure slot, and we all wish this guy had lost this flight, but at least I get the chance to publish this from the tarmac, kind of cool…

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